Still Here, Still Glowing

Can I just say how much I love winter break? It's probably #8 on my list of things I love about being a teacher. (Don't worry, there's an equally long "Things I Hate Can't Stand About Being a Teacher" list...it's a very tough job.) For two weeks, I got to stop focusing on 120 of other people's kids, and focused entirely on my own little bairn. It was awesome!

Since I'm now at Week 30 (hooray!) and in my third trimester, I figured it was time to do some "nesting". I managed to do the following: sew a heaping stack of burp cloths for myself, get half-way through an afghan for baby, get my husband to clean out and paint le Bebe's room, set up the crib, create a registry, finish my novel (the whole break wasn't baby-related) from National Novel Writing Month, go on a heart-healthy walk every day, wash and sort all of the hand-me-down baby clothes that I got, go shopping to fill out the rest of the "need" list, and a bunch of other stuff.

I took care of my husband, who has been suffering from neglect thanks to long work days, and I spent the better part of a few hours each day just enjoying my baby boy - kicking and squiriming. Needless to say, I'm not super excited to go back to work tomorrow, but I'll go ahead and do it...considering I only have 8 weeks to go before (hopefully) baby arrives and I'll be on leave! Woo hoo!

Hope you all had a wonderful holiday and are looking forward to a wonderful new year. Here's hoping that everyone has successfull procedures, long-awaited good news, and healthy babies in 2012!

23 Weeks!

You know what's weird? Growing a human in your mid-section!

My little Tater Tot is getting pretty fiesty these days, and his kicks are very visible. (Unless he's kicking me in the nether-regions, then only I can feel it.) I have moments of sublime happpiness when I feel him moving...

...and then the sureal feeling of knowing that there is a living, not-quite-breathing human being in there sets in. I never really thought about it before, but it is very strange. Don't get me wrong - it's a strange that I love, and a strange that I don't want to end. But it is strange, nonetheless.

I'm at 23 weeks now, and loving every minute. I can't believe how lucky I've been with this pregnancy (though a part of me thinks that I deserve an easy pregnancy). I have only recently started having some lower back pain and some restless legs issues. Sitting in the car for longer than an hour is pretty hard to do. (The drive to NE in two weeks is going to be, ahem, interesting.)

But the fun continues, and I check myself out in every available reflective surface. I'm finally big enough for strangers to ask, "When are you due?" And I love it! You wanna talk about my miracle baby, I think, you bet! Nobody has reached out to touch my belly, though, so I still have that to look forward to.

22 Weeks!

A papaya? Oh my goodness, this little Tot is getting pretty big. Now that I know he's a boy, it has been quite a bit easier to start the bonding process. I talk to him every day. I sing to him every night (I read somewhere that they may remember songs from before birth and it will calm them afterwards...long shot, but I'll take it), and I even ordered a copy of "Peter Pan" to read to him during bedtime. (It was going to be "Alice in Wonderland", but we're on to plan B for Boy.)

My belly is getting nice and round at this point, and I am loving all the clothes that my sister is sending me. I even went online and ordered some stuff from Old Navy, because they're having a 30% off / free shipping sale! Yeah, check it out! Unfortunately, I think my sis and I are officially different sizes. Some items are a bit snug. I'd like to attribute it to my new, ahem, larger chest...but I've put on a few pounds lately anyway, and I'm a size larger than normal. Nevertheless, I am loving the changes and loving my little belly. Those kicks, which happen pretty frequently now, are what I live for. Each one is such a gift.

Names are my only secret...

I know that I've been absent a lot lately... and I can't fully explain why. I have some wonderful things to report! I guess it has a little to do with fear, and a lot to do with guilt. I am well on my way to truly believing that I'm going to have a baby in March, but I still have minor set-backs every so often. I am saddened by the loss that my blog partner-in-IVF has suffered, and I am disappointed in my ability to comfort her or understand what has happened. I also feel guilty that I am doing fine...when her heart is breaking. Hearing about tragedies like hers also reminds me of how frail my condition may be (one never knows).  Nevertheless, I have to keep my baby in mind as I focus on the moments in the last few weeks that have been positiviely life-changing... including the first time my husband felt our baby kick, the 20-week ultrasound, and my changing body.

I have news: We're having a boy! I was certain that it was a girl (helped by the fact that 'Pregnancy Day-by-Day' refers to the fetus as a "she" most of the time), and it took me all of 2 mintues to get over the fact that I wouldn't be buying tutus anytime soon. A boy! Check out my wee son:

The appointment was amazing! We saw a perfect four-chambered heart, two working kidneys (hello, bladder), a big ol' brain, feet, toes, hands, and shapely little bones. The tech said that everything looked "perfect". I loved that the appointment was nice and long - we go to see him move and kick and show us all his "parts". (No, there is no doubt - this is no lassie, it's a lad.) 

I told the kids at school, and they are completely excited. They have since been coming up with names... some of which made the list... at #556 and #9990. Kids come up with some weird names, by the way. (Fifty percent of them want me to name our son after them... ha!) My husband and I haven't had many 'secrets' regarding the pregnancy: everyone knew the when, the where, the how, etc. But names? Names are our secret... you'll find out in March.

Exercise: How much is too much?



I have been feeling a lot better about the health and well-being of my little one lately. No cramping, no spotting, and a strong heartbeat whenever I want to hear it. This is all good news in my second trimester! And I know I need to exercise more than just walking the dogs every day (which is hard when I work from morning to evening). So when this weekend came, I was so exctied to find an easy, flat, 4-mile hike around Twin Lakes. The colors are changing, the time is right, and I couldn't wait to get out of town and into the mountain air.

I live at about 5,400 feet; Twin Lakes is at about 9,000. So, yes, there is a bit of an elevation gain. But the hike is almost completely flat and I took my time completing the four miles. I made sure my heartrate never went above the 140 bpm limit. I ate a great breakfast, a healthy lunch, and we even stopped at my favorite coffee shop for a bowl of cheesy garbanzo and artichoke soup (amazing, by the way!). Nevertheless, I was definately fatigued at the end of the day. I slept like a rock for 9 hours last night.

Today I am TIRED. I seriously hope that I didn't push too hard yesterday. I couldn't have hurt my little one, could I? Some women train for and run 5Ks during pregnancy, right? Sheesh, just when I think I'm confident and content, I get nervous again. I just can't wait to get to the stage that a kick or a punch will reassure me that everything is just peachy in there.

If you are in the Buena Vista, Colorado area, I highly recommend this hike. It's called the Interlaken trail and is part of the Colorado Trail near Granite on Hwy 82.

The Last Time I'll Wear This Skirt...

...at least until next school year! I fit into only about three of my skirts now, so this was one of the last ones. My mom got me a giant cache of maternity clothes (I love you Mom...and Craigslist) from our in CA and sent them to me. So, at least I'm not trying to squeeze into my my jeans!

We are on our way to KS tomorrow (yay for a substitute!) for a wedding, which we are photographing. (I did mention that we moonlight as wedding photographers, right? Well, we do.) It's my husband's cousin, so it will be exciting to see some family there. It's the first time I'll get to be the "pregnant daughter-in-law". I'm excited. And my husband's mom made sure to tell us to "get out and walk around on the drive over." Of course we knew that already (9 hours in the car...oh joy), but it was fun to hear advice from his mom.

Here's what my baby bump looks like this week!

Yes, I'm Still Here...In the Closet

Okay, I have a confession to make: I haven't told the world that I'm pregnant.

I'm at 15w5 days.

I still haven't bought a single baby item. (I did cave in on the maternity pants because my other pants won't button.)

Am I weird? Am I in denial? Am I ever going to be able to fully embrace this? I feel like (already?) a horrible mom-to-be. I keep telling myself (and others) that they can pass on the news at my 12 week...no wait, how about the 16 week...no, the 20-week. We finally had to tell extended family because we're going to a wedding this weekend and I didn't want to "reaveal" my condition as I walk in the door looking like I swallowed a whole cantelope. (Yeah, you can kinda tell.)

But I cannot bring myself to step out of the closet. I haven't made an announcement at our staff meeting at school, I haven't posted anything on FB....I'm just so nervous. Maybe it's habit? Maybe it's nerves? I don't know.