Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Forget Catholic Guilt...Infertility Guilt is Much Worse!

After thousands of my hard-earned dollars have gone to helping science to find the "cure" for my infertility, I find myself looking for ways that I can help, too. My husband gives up all alcohol (yes, even ale) and caffeine for the weeks leading up to our IUI appointments. I gave up running and caffeine (I miss you, Coke) permanently.

That's not to say that I don't relapse now and then. Today, I had a delicious piece of dark chocolate. I know it's laden with caffeine, which is not necessarily a fertility aid, but I don't care! I wanted it so badly and it called for me from its hiding place up on the top shelf. Don't get me wrong, I know in my mind that this tiny piece of cocoa goodness is not going to be the reason for my IUI not working. Nevertheless, since I have spent so much time training myself to let go of these indulgences, when I give in - I FEEL guilty! "You idiot," I tell myself, "you can't even give up a few non-nutritional snacks and beverages so that you can finally force your body into being SO healthy that it absolutely must become pregnant. For shame, woman, for shame." The guilt alone is enough to put me off chocolate for another week. Or at least a day. Or until my husband has his nightly bowl of ice cream. I'm no match for that.

2 comments:

  1. Ummm...I feel like you NEED to be eating chocolate every once in a while. You deserve it chica! And if you really crave a coke, go for it! Deprivation can have its own little effects, too, ya know. ;)

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  2. You deserve it, enjoy it!

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