There's a little room in the very back of my RE's office that I like to call "The Room of Bad News." Back here is where they take you when you're not there to do anything really productive (like have blood work done or have a plastic syringe inserted into your, ahem), just have a talk. It's like a time-out session when you haven't even done anything wrong. "I'm sorry you have to come back here again," my RE sadly proclaimed as she shut the door behind me. Even SHE knows that the room strikes fear into every patient's heart. Today I was back in the Room of Bad News because the last IUI session (the second one) was a resounding failure. She reassures me that if IUIs work, they usually take between 3-4 cycles, so it's still worth trying another one. I'm not so sure. The last one was textbook perfect conditions - excellent sample, lining, the works! As my RE put it: "If it didn't happen then, I don't know why it would any other time." Oh, the support is just overwhelming in the Room. Unfortunately, the next step in the inseminafun (you see how I did that? I made my own portmanteau out of insemination and fun) is another drug that requires bi-daily checkups, and since I'm going to be off gallivanting around the globe over the next two months, I can't do that. So, there will be no moving forward in the fight against babylessness until after summertime is over. Sigh. Another sigh. And another.
All the waiting, all the drugs, all the money, all the organic fruit products…all for naught. I am trying so hard not to give up hope, but hope just doesn't seem to be making itself very available. I think there's a Hope vacuum in the Room of Bad News. Somebody should have that checked out.
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