At one point, I distinctly remember saying that I "wasn't ready to be the 'cool aunt' just yet". In saying this, I was expressing my juvenile penchant for jealousy and bitterness. If I can't have it, I don't want anyone else to, either. And then, the other day, my little niece and nephew came over. Somehow, everything changes when you have a six-year-old standing right in front of you. You're not bitter, you're not angry, you're just 'Aunt Ashlee'. As I sat down with my niece to draw a few pictures, we settled into an artistic collaboration. I drew roses, she colored them in, and our masterpiece was finally decorated with all sorts of butterflies, hearts, and words with backwards letters. Watching her sound out the words and diligently put them down on paper was endearing, to say the least. Being with the two of them reminded me why I ever wanted kids in the first place - they bring something so wonderful and peaceful t o your life. The pride they take in a drawing , the way they echo their big sister's every word, the hugs that are more genuine than any we adults seem to give…it's the magic of youth and innocence. So even if the little arms wrapped around my neck did not come from my own flesh and blood, they are delicate, loving, little arms nonetheless, and my day was brighter for having them in it. While I may still shy away from baby showers, it's the kids I can't resist, and I will say farewell to any bitterness that keeps me from enjoying the subtle smiles, gentle cooing, and infectious giggles that only kids can bestow. And I'll treasure the "Book of Roses" hanging proudly on my refrigerator door, because that's what cool aunts do.
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